For children around the world, the winter holidays are about gifts and a joyful time with their families.
But for some Ukrainian children, the season is bittersweet, as it highlights the absence of one or both parents killed by Russia’s full-scale invasion.
Nearly 1,800 Ukrainian children have become orphans due to the war, the National Social Service of Ukraine said in a comment to the Kyiv Independent in March. A lot more children have lost one parent, as more than 11,970 civilians and at least 31,000 Ukrainian soldiers have been killed since 2022.
Another devastating toll shows that almost 600 children have been killed and over 1,711 have been injured across Ukraine since the start of the invasion.
Forced to face the pain of loss and adapt to life without the guidance and support of their parents, often at a very young age, the war has robbed these Ukrainian kids of their childhoods.
There are organizations in Ukraine that have stepped in to help. In Kyiv Oblast, a private school called "7Fields" supports children who have lost parents to the war in cooperation with the Children of Heroes charity foundation.
The school has 40 such children in its boarding program, where they have lessons, along with psychological support, and various other activities.
They are of different ages and come from various regions of Ukraine, but are united by the painful loss of a parent killed in the war. Most of them are children of fallen Ukrainian soldiers.
"Our focus is specifically on psychological rehabilitation, dedicating as much attention as possible to helping balance the children emotionally," says Alina Kozhuhivska, who works at the school.
"These children have endured trauma, not only from losing their parents but also from having their childhood stolen. Our mission is to help them reclaim their childhood, allowing them to experience it for as long as possible while still children."
"We, as adults, can not return what the war has taken from them, but we can help them build a new foundation, give them faith in humanity, and a chance for a future. These children are our responsibility and our hope," says Tetiana Novytska, the CEO of the Children of Heroes.
The Kyiv Independent visited the school before the St. Nicholas Day holiday, which is celebrated in Ukraine on Dec. 6. We spoke with the children about their stories, as well as their dreams and wishes this holiday season, while they wrote letters to St. Nicholas.
Anna Romashchuk, 13
For 13-year-old Anna Romashchuk from Odesa Oblast, this is the third St. Nicholas Day she is spending without her parents.
Both civilians, her parents were killed in a Russian attack on Serhiivka on July 1, 2022. Russian missiles hit the residential area of the village overnight, taking the lives of 21 people, including children.
"I was at home with my parents. When the first explosion happened, they moved me to the hallway, to the sturdiest wall. They surrounded me with pillows, blankets, and whatever else they could find."
As they went back to another room to grab some documents, a Russian missile hit their home.
"I was screaming and begging for help. Then, I returned to the apartment and tried to enter my parents' room. I kept calling for them, knowing they were home, but I couldn't understand why they weren't answering or what I needed to do to help them."
"Then I finally heard my dad's voice — he was calling for me."
Later in the day, when Anna's older brother arrived at the site of the attack from Odesa, where he was living at the time, they were told their parents had not survived.
"They were so kind and wonderful," Anna says. "They always helped those in need. In our village, there were many older adults, and they would always give them rides to and from church. They would buy them medicine whenever they needed it."
"My kindness… Maybe it's something I got from them," Anna says.
Learning to live without her dearest and closest people has taken her a lot of time and strength.
"I don't think about them constantly. Sometimes, maybe once every couple of months, when the sadness of missing them hits, but otherwise, I try not to dwell on it. I focus on moving forward."
Since she knows how hard it is to overcome such a traumatic experience, Anna wants to become a psychologist in the future. However, one of her biggest wishes remains to "fulfill her parents' dream of seeing Greece or Spain."
"This dream may not be easily achievable, but it can come true if you keep dreaming and thinking about it," she wrote in her letter to St. Nicholas.
Rodion Shcherbakov, 13
Rodion Shcherbakov, 13, from Chernihiv Oblast, can see his father only in his dreams now.
"He appears in my dreams often. And those dreams are very happy, like joyful and bright memories from my childhood," Rodion says.
He explains that they were very close, and no words can describe the way he misses his "tatko" (an affectionate, informal term for "father" in Ukrainian).
Rodion's father joined the Armed Forces shortly after the full-scale invasion started after he had brought his family to a safer part of Chernihiv Oblast.
Russian troops partially occupied the oblast, which is bordered by both Belarus and Russia, in the early stages of the invasion.
The boy does not know the details of his father's military service, only recalling that he tried to be helpful as much as possible and that he rescued civilians from the front line areas.
The body of Rodion's father was found and identified only a year ago.
"He was taken prisoner for three months. He was taken to Belarus. I remember that his name was not on the list of prisoners, but he was in captivity," Rodion says.
"I don't know how he died, but a year ago, just before New Year's, we went to the police; they took a saliva sample with a cotton swab because… they eventually found my dad somewhere in the forest."
Though he misses his father a lot, Rodion derives strength from the support of his mother and his older brother, a soldier, too, just like their dad. Inspired by their service, he is also thinking of joining Ukraine’s Navy.
Rodion takes a moment to decide what he would wish for St. Nicholas and Christmas, saying he has no big dreams. "Maybe going to the Carpathians one more time would be nice," he says.
As for the childhood memories with his father, Rodion cherishes them, describing those moments as "the happiest times."
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Viktoriia Drahan, 12. Tymur Drahan, 10
Viktoriia and Tymur Drahan’s father was killed while defending the town of Bucha in Kyiv Oblast in the spring of 2022.
Zhytomyr Oblast residents Viktoriia and Tymur do not have many memories with their father, as their parents divorced years ago. Still, they miss his attention and kindness, especially during the holidays.
One of Tymur's fondest memories is of their father bringing them a "huge pizza" to share one weekend.
"It wasn't for the holidays or some special occasions, but just for us," Viktoriia recalls.
"He was very, very kind," says Tymur.
In just a few weeks, the children will head home for the holidays to see their mother and friends, something both Tymur and Viktoriia say they are very excited about.
"I have like 200 friends in my hometown," Tymur laughs.
Although they both have different wishes — Tymur dreams of going to Chernihiv, flying in an airplane, having "a mountain of bananas," and a new photo camera, while Viktoriia wants new headphones — both also wish for the war to be finally over and their childhood to be peaceful.
"I want to tell you (St. Nicholas) that you're very interesting and made many wishes true for children. Well done! That's a wonderful thing to do, and you work so hard to bring joy to kids," Viktoriia writes in her letter.
"St. Nicholas, you're doing a great job — keep giving more gifts and creating emotions for children."
Ameliia Nikulysheva, 13
Russia’s war took the life of 13-year-old Odesa resident Ameliia Nikulysheva’s father.
"My parents divorced when I was three years old, but I still saw him often," Ameliia says. "We were very close."
Due to Russia’s heavy bombardment of Odesa, Ameliia and her older sister fled the city in the early days of the full-scale invasion. One day in the autumn of 2022, their mother called and asked them to come back home urgently.
As they returned, Ameliia found out that her father had been killed at the front line. She says her father has been in the military since the start of the war in Donbas in 2014.
"He was a very close person to me. I can't say that my mom was any closer. It was almost on the same level. But still, he was a very, very, very close person to me," she says.
"He was exactly like me. We were just identical," Ameliia says. "In terms of appearance, we were exactly the same. The only difference is that he was bald, and I have hair. That's it.
Everything else was the same. He also was very kind."
"I miss my dad so much, and I really miss his presence. But I won't let myself be sad because life goes on, and everything will be okay," she writes in her letter to St. Nicholas.
Note from the author:
Hi! Daria Shulzhenko here. I wrote this piece for you. Since the first day of Russia's all-out war, I have been working almost non-stop to tell the stories of those affected by Russia’s brutal aggression. By telling all those painful stories, we are helping to keep the world informed about the reality of Russia’s war against Ukraine. By becoming the Kyiv Independent's member, you can help us continue telling the world the truth about this war.
Daria Shulzhenko
